Follow me on Facebook

10/15/2011

Changes - for better, for worse




Things have finally started getting better between RV and me. He has started treating me nicely. We chat for hours at length. He still doesn't go out with me alone but he goes when all of us are going somewhere. By the way, all of us have left Anant, our dramatic society. It happened after a grudge session where we realized that the society is not as beautiful as it seems. It has an ugly face too. There is a lot of politics going on inside this small happy family. And I hate politics. I initially thought that I'll be able to concentrate on the acting part of the society and forget about the politics. But I could not do it. None of us liked them poking their noses in our personal affairs.

I told RV how furious I was because one of our very close friends who is also a senior had told other seniors of the group about our personal issues. This is my life and I do not like anyone at all messing with it. I respected Anant a lot but I just can't stand politics. So, all of us except Riya quit Anant.

I have noticed that the connection between our group is weakening. Though all of us still hang out together but some of us are having issues inside the group. Riya still has a problem with Kashif. She says he is gay. She is too possessive about Suchit. I continually ask her if she has a problem with Suchit and I being friends. But she says she'll never have a problem with me. Everyone has now started disliking RV a bit because of his attitude. No one likes his air of arrogance. He does not go out with us or talk to us or inform us when he comes to college. Abhi is more disturbed than anyone (expect me) by RV's behaviour because he is ‘so called’ RV's closest friend in the group.

RV seems to have problem with Isha. The other day all of us went to watch a movie and RV fought with Isha. I cannot brush away the scene they created there. They were shouting at each other in the mall and then Isha walked off. I ran after Isha to stop her. But she started shouting at me for having such an insensitive boyfriend. I calmed her down and then she came back. People were staring at us in disgust.

I can see complications arising in Palak and my relationship too.  Palak is getting closer to Abhi. We tease Palak with both Abhi and Kashif. No one seems to mind. But Palak is changing. She has turned out to be a little selfish. No doubt, we still are very close but we do not share the same bond we once shared. We fight more often these days. I do not say it’s completely her fault. I have become slightly cold towards people. I am not that lively anymore. A bit of negativity is creeping into my mind. I do not talk properly to anyone, when something goes wrong between RV and me.

My father has been posted to Ludhiana so my entire family has shifted there. I have moved in a pg accommodation. I feel lonely at times. I don't like staying alone. It is affecting my mental state. Home was the only place where I felt at ease and could forget about all the worries for some time. Now I have to deal with my problems all alone. Everything is changing.

The only thing that is changing for good is the relationship between RV and me. He understands me and listens to me now. Though he has those regular mood swings but he has become more sensitive towards me. And I have observed that his emotions are at peak at night. He expresses himself openly then. Rest of the time I do not have the faintest idea what is going on in his mind. I hope this gets better with time and all my worries go away. But the group Palak and I boosted about is falling apart. I wish I am wrong. I wish this never happens.

2 comments:

Drop a comment and help me improve..thanks!